Having an affair isn’t easy. It’s not something you can openly admit to, to very many people, so help is something that won’t be easily found. When you indulge in a little extra-marital activity, there are a few things that you will earn to expect. There’s the paranoia, the rumours, the lies, and everything else involved with having an affair.

The key to having a successful affair is managing to get into it, and out of it, with no one else finding out or getting hurt. Sadly, this is something not easily achieved and something as simple as a forgotten receipt or a slip of the tongue will drop you well and truly in the poop.

Having an affair isn’t something that you should get into lightly. It’s not simply a case of having bit of slap and tickle on the side to help you get through the lonely nights when you are away from your partner/not loved by your partner/can’t remember the last time you had sex with your partner… There are so many things that you need to think about – can you honestly say that you’ve got your game plan sorted?

An affair involves a lot of lying so if this is something you are not good at, it would probably be wise to just avoid doing it. I can’t lie to save my life but over the years that I have (on and off) cheated on my other half, I’ve learned to keep things simple. That’s the trick to keeping your affair a secret – the simpler you keep your tales, the more likely you are to remember them. My memory is atrocious and, as yet, I’ve never been found out. You’ll learn to adapt over time, but at first, you’re going to be all over the place.

You should NEVER, EVER get into a situation where you are having an affair with someone you or your partner knows. Always have an affair with a complete stranger. If it’s anyone close to you or your loved one, it WILL go sour. It WILL go wrong. Things are not going to end well. It’s just too close to home.

Always have an alibi, where possible. It might be worth confiding in a great friend that will cover your ass when you get into hot water. It’s not easy and you will need to expect a lecture, especially if they are a GREAT friend, but they will be there when you need them… You’ll learn who your real friends are, that’s for sure. If you have someone that can cover you with a simple “Oh yeah, she was at mine then…”, you’ll find a way of getting yourself out of any potentially sticky situations. Work is a great way to cover yourself, but not if you use the line too often.

Although you should have an alibi, make sure that is the only person you tell. Anymore than this and you are quite literally playing with fire. People WILL talk, and the fact that you have already told just the one person is putting yourself at risk, to be honest. If they don’t need to know, don’t tell them. They don’t need to know what you are doing each and every moment of the day.

Above all else, never keep a paper trail of your events. If you stay at a hotel, pay in cash or ask to use your NSA partner’s credit card. In this digital day and age, it will take just five minutes to transfer the money over to him or her. At least then you can say you lent the money to a friend rather than staying at the “King George Hotel”. As I’ve said, keep things simple. Lending the money to a friend is as easy explanation. If you make it any more complicated than this, you’re going to forget your own story.